I didn’t want to be a Preacher. I had my reasons. I won’t go into detail, but I had lived among preachers since I was a very young person.
And I knew I was timid; I always had been. I was aware that I could never be one of those preachers who could speak so forcefully, jump up and down and have The Church folk running the aisles.
It just wasn’t me — and it never would be. I loved The LORD so much, but I didn’t fit that mold.
I was called to preach when I was 17 years old. I remember exactly where I was; the very spot when it happened.
I was in my last year of high school at a Bible College called PBI. There was a missionary and his wife speaking to us that night.
While he spoke, she stood down on the floor to the left of the pulpit and she had an easel. She was sketching a beautiful drawing of a sheath of wheat that was ready for harvest. My heart was broken completely and I knew.
That calling never left me; no matter where I went, no matter what I did.
Often, I have wished that The Church would have allowed the prodigals who did return, to testify. That God would never change His mind.
I ran from that particular calling for many years and sometimes, even now. Even when I left The Church as I knew it and never wanted to return, when I would pray and cry out to God, it would be there.
I only wanted to be a Minister of Music — and I became a very good one. I had no formal musical training, but I had a God given talent, and I watched and learned from the very best.
Most are not ready to hear about restoring people; especially the ministers that somehow, were overtaken in a fault.
There have been so many who made terrible mistakes. The Church didn’t want them — and we believed we had failed so badly that even God did not want us.
Many of you will never know what that was like. It wasn’t just ministers. All those who failed that left, and never came back, felt that Jesus no longer loved them.
I say this in The Fear of The LORD. I developed an attitude that if I was going to go to hell anyway, I might as well have a good time doing it. “Oh Robert, I wish you had not done that…..” How could you know what sorrow waited for you?
Jeremiah wrote something I read earlier today. The language is strong in the KJV, but it’s in His Word.
“My bowels, my bowels! I am pained at my very heart, my heart maketh a noise in me; I cannot hold my peace, because thou hast heard, O my soul, the sound of the trumpet, the alarm of war.” Jeremiah 4:19
It doesn’t matter where you have been. God never left you!
I didn’t know that for many years. Jesus had never forsaken me. But they told me that He would.
In some of our ignorance and lack of true knowledge, we have harmed many.
If you were ever given any of The Gifts of the Spirit, you still have them. You had them when you left; and you have them right now, if you are sitting in some Church.
Even if those in authority tried to suppress these gifts, God did not remove them from you. They have continued to work.
Whether you were driven out, or you left for all the reasons people have, God never repented of what He gave you.
We’ve entered a different time. God is in the process of restoring things we would not. Is it because we were not spiritual enough.
The Word says that those who have not failed much, likely do not love much. They may not know the gratitude, the awe, the wonder and sheer humility of someone who has lost so much but it has been given back.
This is the crux of this message. God is going to use them again in this hour. They have suffered more than most could or should know.
So many have suffered even though they might not have been so lost or made the worst mistakes. How could we have thought, that God would just abandon us in such manner and never minister to us again? Our ministry is just over.
I’ve had periods of weeping these last few days. It just suddenly comes over me, just as I moan quietly now.
Tears welling up — but not falling. I feel what’s going on everywhere; what is coming on those who feel they don’t need God. What we might be in for.
God is about to sweep His Hand across us and make some huge changes. Especially in His house. I hear a different kind of trumpet.
There are at least two or more ministers I know who somehow failed, and are not in the Ministry or the Church now.
I must contact them and tell them I have a message for them. “You will always be a Preacher.”
God is going to restore you Himself and is going to use you again. Follow the leading of His Spirit — as you once did. He needs you!
~ Robert Blackburn