Have you ever heard someone say,  “I don’t care if my words hurt!  I speak my mind!”❓

Yeppers…. They hunker down into blunt and harsh retorts or blatant insults and BOOM… They cause pain, offense and it’s hard to want to engage with them.

So, this verse, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1) certainly tells much about how a believer can communicate (even with an enemy) and come out of the encounter honoring God.

My goodness do we ever have an offended society today!

There seems to be a never-ending cycle in our news of someone who has said something that someone else considers offensive.

The end result is that the other person responds harshly to what has been said, which in turn stirs up more anger!

The Proverbs’ verse above begins with an assumption.

Something has been said that can in some way offend — or at least cause a strong reaction in someone’s mind. It speaks of a “gentle answer” which of course indicates that someone has either asked something — or said something that deserves a response.

The question then hangs in the air, “How are we going to respond?”

What’s interesting about this is that we’re not being asked about content — we’re being challenged about the spirit of our response.

“A gentle answer turns away wrath….”   Proverbs 15:1.

This is true when we are offended and want to push back with a harsh answer if we’ve been hurt or offended.

This requires wisdom!

It also requires the work of God’s Holy Spirit – or at least our dependence upon Him in these moments.

We are at least reminded of the reward that we get when we choose to answer gently.

➡️  This kind of answer turns away wrath.  ⬅️

This word “wrath” indicates heat and rage.

This is a person who is in the midst of hot disapproval or what the Bible calls, “burning anger”.

This person is either on the edge of losing it — or — has already lost it.

But, a gentle, gracious answer will turn away this kind of response.

How much we need this is not just when we are angry and offended — but especially when someone else is this way!

There are those times when someone is offended with us — and the situation can either turn more constructive — or it can get completely out of hand.

If we respond to someone with harsh words — the situation is gone — but gentleness will often help the situation calm down and become far more amicable.

But some don’t want to answer gently!

They let their anger fly — and harsh words begin to flow from their mouths.

Some think to answer gently is a sign of weakness.

“Give ’em what they’ve given you, or they’ll walk all over you.”

( By the way, these are also the people who frequently wind up in verbal shouting matches – and have a long list of people who know better than to try to deal with them unless they have to. )

Harsh, cutting, caustic, MEAN words, stir up anger!

The word “stir” is an interesting word.  It means to cause something to take off, to ascend, or to go to another level.

The word for anger here is “aph” and it actually describes the “flaring of the nostrils”.  It describes someone who is angry!

The Hebrews spoke of those “who had a long nose” which meant they were slow to wrath and anger.  Someone with a short nose was someone with a quick temper.

When we answer with harsh words, the person hearing us will have their anger elevated — it will go to another level — it will cause them to have a short nose, i.e. a quicker temper.

I’m sure you’ve seen this.

Someone begins an argument or voices their frustration.

Rather than trying to understand, the second person just reacts — and away we go!

I’ve watched things elevate quickly and have seen two people have their noses get shorter and shorter.

Their anger grows — wrath is loosed — and soon a shouting match is the result.

Here is the end of the matter.

Showing restraint is a good thing!  Showing a long fuse on your temper is wise.

We are very wise when we choose NOT to escalate an argument with the way we speak our words.

When we choose to answer gently and with wisdom, we will find God often diffusing a situation that easily could have wound up as a major blow up between us and our friend or neighbor.

Jesus Himself modeled gentleness and compassion, even when correcting others.

In Matthew 11:29, He invites,  “Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

The term “harsh” in the Bible often refers to actions, words, or attitudes that are severe, unkind, or lacking in compassion.

Throughout Scripture, believers are cautioned against harshness, especially in their interactions with others, since it contradicts the principles of love, gentleness, and kindness that are central to Christian living.

So choose gentleness . . .

I doubt you will ever regret it!

 

In His Shadow,
~ Mary Lindow ^©

Duplication and sharing of this writing is welcomed as long as complete message and website information for Mary Lindow is included. Thank You!
” THE MESSENGER ” ~ Mary Lindow
www.marylindow.com
Global Prayer Rooms

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Mary Lindow has a passion for encouraging others – all generations, careers or vocations to live expressing excellence through personal integrity, healthy accountability, and wise management of talents and skills. She’s a sought after keynote, inspirational, humorous speaker and teacher across the USA and internationally in Ministers & Spiritual leaders Conferences, and training seminars for various organizations.

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