I Hate Divorce! says the LORD

 

“For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel.  “To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies. “So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife,”   Malachi 2:16.

Not only does it overwhelm the spouses with cruelty, it overwhelms the children as well.

Divorce doesn’t just rip apart the husband and wife, but it rips apart and destroys the identity of the children, strips them of security, ripping their world as they have known it apart.

It destroys families financially.

The grass isn’t greener on the other side, so you put energies and efforts into someone new rather than your spouse and family and rather than putting the effort in becoming a new you.

Divorce is rooted in rebellion, stubbornness, and pride.  It is extremely selfish; when marriage and family and being a parent requires one to be selfless.

Only Christ can heal, mend, change hearts, and restore broken families.  It takes one or both disconnected from Him to ravage and cause carnage to the sanctity of marriage and family.

Before anymore damage is done to the ones you profess to love the most (your children) seek the LORD.

Its cheaper to keep her/ him.

The LORD commands a blessing on unity (Psalm 133).  To continue to destroy your spouse and your children’s lives only opens up demonic doors to curses upon them and the generations to follow.

When struggling to make that marriage work, to keep your family intact; its simple: Ask the LORD for the grace to put it back together, the grace to change yours-their hearts and be fully committed to allowing the LORD to transform you while you pray for your spouse.

If that is not feasible upon an initial break-up, then learn to co-parent peacefully and heal as individuals before ever bringing someone else in.  You deserve that time, your children deserve that time of healing and most important the LORD deserves that time and permission to come in giving Him a chance as you yield to and work with Him to be healthy individuals leading to healthy families.

 

~ Jennifer Mars


Jennifer MarsJennifer N. Mars is a Minister from Syracuse, NY and is a Co-Founder of Zion International Ministries.

 

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Comments

I Hate Divorce! says the LORD — 3 Comments

  1. I should like to put this article up for to read-Perry Noble strikes a good balance which makes sense to me as a Christian and as a Psychologist:

    JUN 5, 2015 | RELATIONSHIPS

    THREE THINGS I WOULD SAY TO A DIVORCED PERSON
    Some of the most frequently asked questions in churches have to do with the issue of divorce.  There is not one person reading this article right now that does not know someone who has gone through a divorce. You’ve seen the guilt, pain, fear and uncertainty that comes along with it.

    What would I specifically say to a divorced person if I had the chance to sit down face to face with them?

    #1 – You are not a piece of crap!

    I’ve met very few people who have gone through a divorce that actually felt like they had accomplished something awesome. 

    The Bible does say in Malachi 2:16 that God hates divorce… but THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT GOD HATES YOU!!!

    God hates divorce because He knows and understands the cycle of heartache and pain that it is going to bring about in the lives of so many people.  However, if you have gone through a divorce… get this– He knew that about you before you were even born.  And He made you anyway, loved you, made arrangements to pay for your sin and is with you right now!!

    #2 – You are NOT going to have to settle in the future if you want a relationship.

    I’ve seen way too many divorced people (especially women) buy into the lie that they are “damaged goods,” and because of that they think they should not expect to ever have any sort of great relationship in the future.

    If I could, I would lock eyes with every divorced person on the planet and beg them to not believe this.

    I’ve seen the people who bought into this lie (because they were desperate for a relationship) begin dating someone and literally say, “I know I should not be with that person, but I’m divorced and they are the only person who will have me.”

    THAT’S NOT TRUE!!! 

    There is not a thing you can do about your past—but, in Christ He really is able to do immeasurably more than anything you could ever ask for or imagine.

    Even if you’ve been divorced.

    #3 – Don’t rush back into marriage!

    I understand a divorced person may deal with extreme bouts of loneliness; however, don’t let fear of being alone cause you to rush into a relationship that over time causes you to feel more lonely than you did when no one was around. 

    It’s always best after a divorce takes place to take some time to reflect, to ask Jesus to help you with any bitterness you feel towards your ex-spouse, to own up to anything you may have done to bring about the divorce (instead of always blaming your spouse for everything) and to allow Jesus to bring healing to your heart.

    ONE MORE THING:

    If you are reading this right now and are married but considering a divorce…don’t use this article as an excuse to go ahead and go through with it.

    I really do believe that divorce is not God’s best plan for our lives.

    I believe if couples would learn to fight for one another rather than with one another that the quality of relationships would dramatically improve.  Jesus will walk with you and your spouse through this difficult time—and the best thing you can do if you feel like giving up is ask for help ASAP!!! 

    I did not write this article to give someone permission to seek out a divorce, but rather to let those who have gone through one know that their life is not over.

  2. I have to disagree with the generalization as well. Abuse in marriage is far more detrimental to children than divorce. God called me out of a marriage of extreme abuse. It was later found out that my ex is a pedophile.  Obviously God knew what he was doing to protect me and my kids. These assumptions that God hates all divorce gets women killed.  [Comment Redacted by HKP Admin.].

  3. I disagree with your generalizations on divorce.  There are mental illnesses, specifically personality disorders, where it is better for a family to divorce than stay together in a toxic marriage where one person is non-repentant and not willing to get help.  A person who is a victim of the abuse from a person with a personality disorder may need to completely detach from their spouse through divorce.  The bible says if your eye causes you to sin than pluck it out.  The bible allows divorce as separation for purposes of later reconciliation.  Divorce was never meant to be forever with the exception of infedelity.  America’s definition of divorce is not the same as God’s.

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