Only a Friend Can Betray a Friend


One clear definition of slander is to talk about someone with the intent to hurt them.  To whisper and hiss subtle, condescending, suggestive thoughts that someone is missing the real deal.  That they are not as genuine as others know them to be, all because the slanderer says so.

What makes each case of betrayal and slander so painful is that someone who knows your heart — who knows your longings and character — turns from that and chooses to twist and malign you to others.

The mind freezes as it tries to grasp how a friend or parent or family member, someone who knew you deeply, intimately, could turn on you and attack you.

The singer songwriter Michael Card vividly captures the agony in one song:

“Only a friend can betray a friend,
A stranger has nothing to gain
And only a friend comes close enough
To ever cause so much pain…..”

Betrayal, I’ve noticed, calls good evil.  It twists a person’s true spiritual endowments into something negative, a spiritual deficiency or psychological problem.

Betrayal and slander cause leaders to not want to trust, to not want to be involved or vulnerable, to not open their spirits and hearts to others.

What does it mean to slander?

To make a false and malicious statement that damages somebody’s reputation.  To set somebody or something up in opposition to somebody or something else. To divide.

2 Timothy tells us that in the last days there will be slanderers and false accusers spreading innuendo and criticism and reporting things unjustly about others.

Scorpions carry poison in their tails;
Snakes carry it in their cheeks,
And slanderers carry it in their tongues.

Character assassination is an intentional attempt to influence the portrayal or reputation of a particular person, (whether living or a historical person), in such a way as to cause others to develop an extremely negative, unethical or unappealing perception of him or her.

Its rather ugly nature involves deliberate exaggeration or manipulation of facts, to present an untrue picture of the targeted person.

For living individuals, this can cause the target to be rejected by his or her community, family, or members of his or her living or workplace.  Such acts are very difficult to reverse or correct, and the process is much like an assassination of a human life.  The damage sustained can be life-long and more, and for historical people, it might last for many centuries after their death.

If the devil has any servants that he values the most, are they slanderers or gossips?
I believe they are!

Don’t give up!

You may be tempted to flee, to turn your back on your call.  You are walking where great people have walked before.  They are remembered as great because they did not allow the betrayal to stop them. Instead they learned how to turn their pain into greater usefulness for the LORD.

In Psalm 15, David speaks such a powerful lesson about THE PERSON who can truly ascend to a place of Walking with God in a holy high place.

A psalm of David.
“LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary?  Who may live on your holy hill?
He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong, and casts no slur on his fellowman, Who despises a vile man, but honors those who fear the LORD, who keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends his money without usury
and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.
He who does these things will never be shaken,”  
Psalm 15:1-5.


In His Shadow,
~ Mary Lindow ©

Duplication and sharing of this writing is welcomed as long as complete message and website information for Mary Lindow is included.  Thank You!

” THE MESSENGER ” ~ Mary Lindow

Mary Lindow imageMary Lindow has a passion for encouraging others – all generations, careers or vocations to live expressing excellence through personal integrity, healthy accountability, and wise management of talents and skills. She’s a sought after keynote, inspirational, humorous speaker and teacher across the U.S.A and internationally in Ministers & Spiritual leaders Conferences, and training seminars for various organizations.

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Only a Friend Can Betray a Friend — 1 Comment

  1. Thank you Ms. Lidow!  This is exactly what i have been going through on my job for the past 5 years.  I have been on Medical leave because of the stress and also had health problems which became worse.  I no longer work there since May 2016 of this year, but the influences of this pain still linger.  So much damage was done, i thought about getting an attourney.  Slander and character assasination can truly harm you, for a very long time and even after death.