What does it mean to enable? Or to forbear?
Forbearance is overlooking the faults or weaknesses of others. It is the ministration of peace which gives us forbearance with others. It is a security, in knowing how much God loves us and others.
I want to give you an example from my own life:
After my natural mother died, (I was also raised half my life by foster parents) my sister was angry at me for something the enemy convinced her that I had done. However, she was judging my motivations, and actions in a very critical way, and was spurned on by one of my mother’s sisters.
I’ll mention here that my sister was a “new-ager” and got involved in ‘Unity’ through my mother. Well, shortly thereafter, I was in church on a Sunday, and a very wonderful violin player had a solo part in the worship set.
As he played under the anointing, I began to smell roses, the presence of the LORD wafting over me again and again throughout the service, until at its end I realized, I had such great peace.
I could have just stayed there and slept and not only that, but I felt such security and comfort in that place. Then on Monday, I went to get my mail and there was an envelope from my sister. I was walking to a friend of my son’s when I opened it and started to read it.
Normally, I would have been leveled emotionally by what was in the letter. There was such hatred and anger, years of being compared to each other. The witchcraft manipulation of my mother had brought such division between us.
But I was strangely at peace. Then I thought of how at Church the day before I had received such an impartation of peace. In that moment I realized the blessed love and care of the LORD, as HE knew she was sending that letter and purposed to protect me from the assignments of the enemy attached to it !
Isn’t that a loving and kind thing to do? How wonderful is He?!
That is why I know that it is HIS PEACE that gives us forbearance! It is on top of that, a testimony to the fact that if you want peace in this violent world, you must spend time at His feet worshipping and letting Him love on you to have what you need to overcome the assaults of the enemy in this world.
What is the key to overcoming sin, the world, the flesh and the devil? It is yielding to be overcome BY HIM!
We must rest – there is SO MUCH BUSYNESS in this life, even in the Church. Some people go from activity to activity in the Church, and never really get to know people through real relationship.
And some are so busy IN the church they never reach outside of it. We have to be FLEXIBLE to be overcomers and AVAILABLE to the LORD if we want to be used.
Forbearance is a key that is unlocked by the ever loving arms of the LORD when we come to Him and receive His love and peace. We are then transformed by His glory and can do the work of the Kingdom with much less stress and we’ll have more to give of HIM, if there is more of HIM in us.
Enablement is a term used in recovery. It generally means doing for others, what they can do for themselves, if we let them. Sometimes DOING for others can cause harm to them. It can make them useless in areas of their lives, or irresponsible.
As an example: I went away to nursing school and lived in a dorm, after having 3 years of biology under my belt. I found out then, there were other girls whose moms had never taught them how to wash clothes, or how to cook, or clean, or pick up after themselves, or to do things for themselves, and they were lost without this
They had to learn these things for themselves, and sometimes would be in great dismay, or discouragement because of it. Their moms had enabled them.
Love does no harm to another. It says in 1 Corinthians 13, we must have the LORD as our teacher, if we want to be in His will and not enable others. We must ask, “Do YOU want me to do this LORD?”
That is surrendering our will to HIS. What would bless one person can harm another, and vice versa.
I remember once when I was so sick and while on food stamps, I was going into a store to buy food and I saw a homeless woman with no shoes, filthy and unkempt, tall, thin, with a blanket-like poncho on, in front of the Vons Store. I started to feel like I should give her some money for food, so I went up to her.
Her face was turned away and she was standing next to the concrete garbage bin in front of the store. I tapped her on the arm lightly, to put the $20 in her hand, and there was instead a power-encounter between light and darkness!
She turned on me throwing the 7-Up in her hand into my face and screamed at me, “Who told you, you could touch me you ______!?” And then she proceeded to pull cans and bottles out of the garbage, hurling them at me.
So that what I wanted to do in secret, suddenly was turned into a ruckus. I ran into the store to get away and the managers came up to me, my nerves kind of shattered. Just before they came up to me the LORD whispered in my ear, “Did I tell you to give her the money?”
It taught me a strong lesson about OBEDIENCE! God loves obedience more than sacrifice, and mercy more than sacrifice, it says in the Bible.
I am not to be drawn in by my own fleshly compassion, but solely reliant on the direction of the LORD in each situation of my life, and every day and hour of my life.
God’s compassion is another thing than that of the flesh. He alone, knows what is in the heart of a man or woman.
In the days ahead, we will need compassion and we will need discernment and to know the voice of the LORD, and to not listen to that of another.
THAT is why the LORD wants us to REST in Him and take time for the perfumed oil of HIS PRESENCE to be “rubbed” into us, that we might be like Him, only doing what the Father is doing.
I have seen many Churches who move in the gifts and great power, who do NOT have the fruit of the Spirit as they ought. Some of them don’t even have the heart to reach out to the poor in their own neighbor-hoods.
Then there are those who seem to have love and kindness, but no power. The Church needs balance.
We need to have the gifts of the Spirit which reflect the power of God, and we need to have the fruit of the Spirit, that reflect the character of God, like John Dawson says.
All of that is available through Christ, if we would only take the Time to spend in His Presence. He is the Resource of every-thing we lack or need.
When God’s LOVE gets poured out on us, we will have the fruit we need, as when we realize how much He truly loves us, we will not compete with one another, we won’t be critical, greedy for recognition and power, or jealous of others, or apathetic towards others. We won’t have to put others down to make ourselves look better.
There are many parents who were victims of not receiving the love they needed, who then enable their children out of a false sense of guilt maybe they were drug addicts, or alcoholic in the past and their children, now teens have not forgiven them for their control and impatience, or intolerance; the abuse.
People in the Church and in the world are in great need of healing of their emotions. So many have been so greatly wounded until they feel like they have been slain.
The rejection so great, that defensive pride grows and grows till it keeps them from the very thing they need most – receiving the LOVE of God and also that through the LOVE of others. Their receivers are broken.
People who have undergone great rejection, have trouble receiving from others. They can give, and that is where they feel SAFE. But their pride won’t allow them to receive. it makes them feel vulnerable.
God is a great healer. In a touch, He can change a person’s life, and we need faith for that.
In Revival, we have seen God do what no amount of counseling or pursuing healing from man could do. Yet God most often uses men and women to help heal people need LOVE with flesh on it.
They need the tender touch of another human being. And they need those persons to be FORBEARING, as so many have been wounded, they have the wounded lamb syndrome.
That is like when a sheep falls, and is on it’s back and it cannot right itself without the help of the shepherds. And the shepherds know to be careful how they approach such sheep, as they are prone to kick them as they try to help.
It is very much like that with helping the severely emotionally damaged! I have been one of these. And there are those who tried to help, and I was critical towards them, and unruly at times.
I was sexually ritually abused as a child (2-4yrs) by my step dad. I had such fear and rejection, anger and rebellion in my heart, due to the damage done to me. Yet what was done to me was nothing compared to others I know.
It is hard to minister to such as these, unless we have been healed ourselves.
So let us put on love, which is the greatest, as the Word says. Learn to overcome, to forbear with the weaknesses of others, to love our enemies, to be good to those who hate us, and to pray for those who spitefully use us.
There is a wonderful movie I just watched called “Walking Across Egypt” with Ellen Burstyn in it, who plays an elderly Christian woman trying to help a young prodigal youth.
It is very prophetic for where the church needs to be. May God bless us all with the courage to be fully healed and to overcome, that we may walk like He walked, and talk like HE talked, and love like HE loved, In Jesus name.
by: PRISCILLA VAN SUTPHIN of Upstream Ministries, California www.upstreamca.org and www.blogtalkradio.com/Upstream Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Donate to Upstream: via secure Paypal by sending as gift to email@example.com or send to: Upstream, PMB 545, 14311 Newport Blvd, Suite G, Tustin, CA 9278.