Egotism is difficult to deal with in relationships, and recognizing it will absolutely help us to respond differently to it.
Jesus was constantly aware of what was in the heart of the people that he dealt with!
“There was no need for anyone to tell him about them, because he himself knew what was in their hearts,” John 2:25.
He knew when people were willing to hurt him, when people were insincere, when people were manipulating him, and when people were pretending.
It’s a Mean and Vindictive World!
You and I need to know who and what we are dealing with so we can respond in a way that is also wise.
Here are five characteristics of an Egotist.
1. An inability to look inside of their own souls.
When you try to get Egotists to look at themselves, you will find them extremely defensive.
They are not willing to admit they are wrong, to admit they are afraid, to admit they are weak, or to admit they are Egotists or insolent proud scoffers.
They will react angrily, manipulatively, punitively, and arrogantly to your criticism and suggestions.
There comes specific situations and times where you absolutely can no longer dance around the behaviors and condescending abuses.
Although Egotists are masterful at appearing all knowing and grand, they can fool the crowd and make you look like a silly “little person” in order to feed their ego.
2. A lack of genuine empathy for anyone else.
Egotists and those who display Insolent pride and snarky mocking chatter, are unable to see other people’s pain even when that pain is caused by their own actions.
It is as if they cannot see any viewpoint but their own. In fact, if you try to get them to understand they have hurt you, they will usually show contempt and disdain for your weakness. It’s YOUR fault for feeling hurt by their bad behavior.
3. A sense of entitlement or special treatment.
The Egotist expects to be treated special and expects that his/her wishes will be complied with.
This expectation doesn’t allow others to have different opinions, say no, or have needs.
If you refuse to do what they want, you will be threatened, blamed, and made to feel guilty.
4. An exaggerated view of oneself.
Egotists don’t have an honest self assessment. They have an inflated view of their abilities, achievements, brilliance, or talent.
They don’t hesitate to talk about themselves or to flaunt their high view of themselves and expect others to recognize this superiority.
They also think that they work so much harder at what they do, so they need special favors and expect others to understand heir choice to be rude and snipe when they’ve had a bad day.
5. Lack of respect for others’ individuality.
You do not exist as a separate person with your own needs, opinions, desires, and individuality.
Instead, you live as an extension of the Egotist. Your boundaries, needs, and opinions won’t be respected because they don’t matter; the only thing that matters is what the Egotist — insolent proud scoffer feels, needs, wants, and believes.
“In their own eyes they flatter themselves too much to detect or hate their sin,” Psalm 36:2.
Know this! God truly sees the situation in full scope and in high definition!
If you must step away from the toxic and excessive criticism and unrelenting subtle and often heavy punishing behaviors that the narcissist uses to get even or to control with, do so — and without feeling the need to explain.
➡️ You can’t have honest dialog with a toxic person who refuses any real accountability for their behavior.
You will talk in circles with them never owning up to their bad behavior or choice to deny any wrong doing or harm.
Live a simple and quiet life, and share your heart with those who are beautifully broken before God.
Those who are filled with kindness and and open honest heart dialog about loss, life and hope!
➡️ People must CHOOSE to be accountable to someone for bad behavior or harm they have caused to others.
And it needs to be someone who will firmly but in grace, tell the truth to those in denial. Not always an easy task! But repentance and accountability go hand in hand!
“Admit your faults to one another and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The honest prayer of a person who has their heart right with God has great power and wonderful results,” James 5:16.
There is remarkable healing power in talking to a trustworthy friend or counselor, or mentor about our sins, faults, and failures.
Confession brings us the freedom that enables us to move forward with our lives, because it brings the hidden things of darkness in ourselves, into the light, where they lose their power.
Remember, Jesus died for our sins, and if we believe, we are forgiven and set free from every one of them.Therefore, it’s not the sins we commit that are the most grievous, but the sins we hide!
So, tell someone. Today!
Once we come to realize the power of confession and intercession, we will never again hide the things we should expose.
This is the sweet and clean fellowship like-minded believers enjoy. Confession and prayer are gifts from the Lord, and we must open those gifts more and more often. Our healing awaits!
Finally, all of you, be like-minded and sympathetic, love as brothers, be tender-hearted and humble.
Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.… (1 Peter 3:8-9).
Let’s Pray –
Father, I will no longer hide behind shame and fear.
I will regularly confess my sins and faults to You and a believer I trust.
I want to be healed, free, and clean in You.
In Jesus Christ, Amen.
In His Shadow,
~ Mary Lindow ©
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Mary Lindow has a passion for encouraging others – all generations, careers or vocations to live expressing excellence through personal integrity, healthy accountability, and wise management of talents and skills. She’s a sought after keynote, inspirational, humorous speaker and teacher across the U.S.A and internationally in Ministers & Spiritual leaders Conferences, and training seminars for various organizations.